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Did you ever have a day where the thought of doing the same old
thing again makes you want to run away as fast as you can? You just can’t stand to add the same numbers up again or go listen
to the same boring presentation. The status quo has a way of causing all of us to want to rebel from time to time. I know
it had that affect on my life last week.
One job I do every week
is to prepare a video announcement for our church’s morning service. People seem to pay more attention to things when they see
it on a video announcement. Normally, I enjoy doing this task as I try and find interesting and humorous ways to
present the upcoming events. However, this had been a really tough week as the Holidays quickly approached and I was tired.
As I sat down to write the “script” for the announcement, I suddenly
found myself in a very silly mood. I wrote the script faster than I ever had before. However, upon further review, I questioned
if it really was appropriate for Christmas Sunday. I’ll let you decide for yourself.
First, let me show you what the announcement should have said. The announcement starts off with a pleasant greeting such as
“Here a few exciting things going on at our church”. During this time, people are suppose to stop shaking hands and watch the
video. However, this isn’t always the case as they continue greeting and shaking hands.
Next, I had to announce the holiday schedule of service and the church office changes, followed with a few ministries that were breaking
for the holidays.
Finally, I had to mention the upcoming sermon
series, the churches 21 days of fasting and prayer in the New Year, and also mention that our children’s missionary fundraiser was
breaking for the holidays. I always end with asking them to sign the register so the pastor can contact any visitors. Sounds easy enough, right?
Well, I wasn’t in the mood for easy. I was risking going on Santa’s naughty list this day, because I was just feeling mischievous. So here is a copy of what I actually
wrote.
"Listen up everybody! Sit down and stop talking. It takes me hours to do this announcement, so pay attention! Every week you miss the first half of the announcement because you won't stop talking. You can talk to each other before and after service. Make a phone call, send an email, but for now sit down and stop talking…we all ready now? Okay, here we go…
Here
are a few things coming up soon:
Remember there will be no evening
service tonight as we all celebrate Christmas with the ones we love…not that we don’t love the people at church, it is just a figure
of speech.
Parents, just a reminder, there will be no Girls Ministry
or Rainbows on Weds. Dec. 28th., so either stay home, or bring plenty of paper for them to doodle on while pastor preaches.
Just a reminder, The Quest ForAuthentic Manhood, Divorce Care and the Berean Study Center are all taking a short break for the Holidays.
Keep an eye on the announcement for when they will resume again…..The truth is that we all just need a break because we are here every
stinkin' day!!!
Remember, the church office will be closed, tomorrow
December 26th…the church secretary just needs a break from all of us.
New Years also falls on Sunday this year. We will be having a regular morning service, including Sunday school. However, there
will be no pm service. So nurse your hangovers before the service and you can rest the entire rest of the day.
The church office is going to be closed again on January
2nd…It’s been a long holiday for our secretary this Christmas, she REALLY needs a break.
In January, Pastor will be beginning his new sermon series, "Getting to Know God Better." We look forward to seeing all
of youas we learn about the various names of God….DISCLAIMER, this is not a seminar to teach new phrases to use when you are
angry with each other.
Did you know you can buy copies
of each week’s sermons on cd? This is an excellent way for the church to make a little extra money, and it gives the sound
guy something to do during the sermon.
You better eat
up this holiday season, because we will be having 21 days of prayer and fasting in the New Year.
It is too late to place Christmas orders for script gift cards for Christmas; however, (the woman in charge) is willing to accept
any gifts of cash, presents, or Steelers tickets.
Finally,
we’d appreciate it if you would please grab the red book on the left side of the pew and sign your name. Then pass it to the
right. We want to be able to connect with any and all visitors, so please make sure to take a second and do this. Seriously,
do it! I ask you to every week, but I never see any of you do it!
These are just some of the many things going on at Harrisburg First A/G this Christmas season, so be sure to remember these events.”
As you can see, it wasn’t really Christmas morning appropriate. But boy, did I enjoy writing it! The few people at church that I showed it to thought it was hilarious, too. Honestly, how many of you haven’t felt the same way about some of the announcements at your church?
So why do I tell you this? Well, next time you have to face the mundane hum drum you face daily, stop and think of a way to spice it up. Even if you never use it, sometimes you just need to learn to laugh!
